Monday, September 30, 2013

It Feels Really Good!

I'm sitting at home studying (ministerial training of Pathways of Light).  There's a peaceful silence in my home at this time.  It's 9 pm, my son is in his room, and it's quiet outside as well.  It feels so good that I'm motivated to blog about it. 
But it's not just that.  I'm proud of myself because I am experiencing one of my biggest life desires, and that is to support myself, to be able to take care of me. 
I feel that I am finally going within to learn who I am, what it is that I like, what gives me joy.  I'm making wiser choices as to whom I want to have in my life. I also feel healthier in my spirit, in my body and mentally also.  I used to be depressed, anxious and scared of Life.  My desire to heal and to be on my own was very strong and I now am here.
Because of my upbringing, I never learned to choose what was in my best interest.  I didn't know how to trust myself.  This was something vital for me to learn. 
I've done a lot of inner work and I'm in a better place now.  It feels really good.
I met with a friend today, Alicia.  A lovely and spiritual being.  We talked for a long time.  I was surprised at her comment that she was inspired by me, because I was being my own person and that it's possible to be independent as a woman.  Wow.  My life inspires other women.  That's huge for me.
I  continue to move forward with my life.  I trust myself more and am learning to quietly listen to my inner Self, which is different, totally different, from the ego thoughts of fear, lack and dependency that ruled my life in the past.  I have not mastered this yet, but am on the right path and practicing moment to moment.  
It feels really good!