Micro Dreams and Macro Dreams

This morning I woke up from a really strange dream.  I won't go into detail, but it was about me getting married to someone I really didn't want to marry and now had to break it off.  I was having difficulty talking to the groom-to-be because he and I had no connection, he never looked at me in the eyes, and also my father visited in the dream, looking happy, handsome and in a suit.  People in the dream would be hurt by me not going through with the wedding, but I was determined to not do it.

When I woke up I had this feeling of relief and was thankful it was just a dream.  Then I remembered what A Course in Miracles consistently states, that this seeming life I'm living is also a dream.

As I had that thought, I said to God in my mind....how can this be a dream when it seems so real? And another thought to answer that one popped in my head:  how can this NOT be a dream?  It's a crazy experience, with so many uncertainties, fears, ever-changing situations, birth, a few years to learn, earn a living, raise a family or whatever we choose to do here, and, in most cases, there's aging, sickness and then death.  Like my husband always says, we have micro dreams and this is a macro dream.

How can this NOT be a dream?

My priority over all else is to awaken from this dream by healing my mistaken perceptions!  I'm not always aware of this, and I get caught up in the ego illusions, but I ask Spirit to remind me all the time so I can choose to see what is true and real each moment.

Fear of Abandonment

Someone close to me shared a thought they had about how contradictory it is that we are so very dependent physically and emotionally we are as a species and yet we suffer from fear of abandonment.....and how that fear of abandonment is present throughout our lives and in most of our relationships.  

I thought about it for a while before commenting back on the thought. I think we experience this fear of abandonment because at a very deep level we have felt abandoned by our Creator.  I know I have felt this way in the past as if God had sent me down here and just left me to my own luck.  I felt lost, alone and confused believing I had to fend for myself.

It's a deep feeling of abandonment, and honestly, only God can heal that.  Of course, I realize now that God never abandoned me and it's only a perception I have.  God always Is.

Since I've been more willing to heal my mind and my perception of myself and of this whole world, I feel God's presence in my life and become aware that I am not alone, that God never left me, that I chose at some level to be independent and separate from God (which is impossible)....this hasn't worked out well at all.  Just look at the condition of this world.

As I do the work of removing the blocks in perception, which are the false beliefs in guilt and sin and punishment, and focus on what is Truth, the fear dissipates.

God has never left me nor judges me and there is nothing to fear.  The parable of The Prodigal Son in the Bible in Luke 15:11–32 is an idea of the loving Farther God is.  God is Love.

The Best Judge of What My Body Needs is Me!

The best judge of what my body needs is me! I've been pretty healthy most of my life.  Other than constipation years ago, which now is not an issue, I've never had any major health issues.  

Exercise has always been a part of my routine, whether it's walking, yoga, aerobic classes, some weights and now biking.

About 5 or 6 years ago my knees began to ache.  Beginning of arthritis was the diagnosis, in my knees and a few other joints as well, as time has passed.  With physical therapy, massage therapy, visits to a chiropractor, no heels and shifting from power walks to biking.....my knees are way better and I can wear heals again (sometimes).

Yet, my greatest health challenge remains to be food!  I love to eat and have a pretty big sweet tooth. My Latin background is partly to blame, as I love our rice and beans, cafe con leche, tostones, and all the tasty foods that get my taste buds fiesta dancing!!!  I've never been fat but have carried about 12 extra pounds for many years; I was able to lose most of them last year, although I've gained a few back.  I do have much more awareness of  the quality and quantity of what I eat now.

Because of what has started to show up in my body, you know, the aches, arthritis, I have taken more of an interest in my nutrition.  I've read books and articles and also watched many educational videos on the subject to be better informed and able to make wiser choices.  

But I realize how much time and focus I have spent continuously thinking about what to eat, when to eat, is this going to make me fat, sick, diabetic, etc., etc.  Last week coffee was bad for me, yesterday it's now good.  Eat meat, don't eat meat.  Carbs, fats, vegetarian, vegan, Paleo, Atkins, on and on, each affirming it's THE way to eat.  OMG.  How confusing and contradictory!!!   What is "good" or "bad" for the body is constantly changing.  Something so natural and enjoyable has become daunting.

You know what?  I have concluded the best judge of what my body needs is me!  I appreciate all the information and choose wisely.  I believe food is to be enjoyed and not feared.  It's about balance!