I would say no. Self-care is never selfish (unless I have no regard for another’s feelings or best interests).
I understand I am responsible for my own well-being. Physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally. Self-care can be setting healthy boundaries when someone is over-stepping them, not respecting my space or being manipulative to get what they want.
Self-care can mean saying “no” to an invitation or to someone I care about because I need time to myself to rest and be still.
It can be treating myself to a massage or a nice meal at a sassy restaurant because I need to feel pampered.
In the past I had confused self-care with being selfish; I believed that putting others first was selfless; but it doesn’t work. In the long run it made me feel depleted and unappreciated (by myself mostly). Self-sacrifice usually means I am giving more than what I can and I may be expecting to be acknowledged for this. But I understand I cannot give of what I don’t have for myself. If I stretch my capacity trying to please others, I will feel resentful, and that is not healthy.
When I care for myself and honor my own needs, I can care and love others from a place of wholeness. It’s a win-win experience.
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