"In a special relationship, I have given my partner the task of making me happy. The arrangement stems from a belief in lack, that what I need has to be supplied by my partner. Finally, a special relationship is a prolonged bargaining session which is doomed to fail; sooner or later my partner does not keep his or her end of the bargain."
I know this very well. I was in such a relationship for many years, it ended up in co-dependency and losing myself. I have also had this kind of interaction with others, not just a partner, where I am expecting them to make me feel happy, good, etc. This has only set me up for disappointment and has perpetuated my lack of growth as a whole being.
Once I embarked on the quest of understanding what love is, my relationships are based more on mutual appreciation, healthy boundaries and deeper connection. It is a continuous work in progress because this takes self-honesty and awareness.